


Chicken Soup for The Stupid!

by Lady_Blade_WarAngel



Series: Adventures of The Crazy [1]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-04
Updated: 2014-10-04
Packaged: 2018-02-19 19:24:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2399990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Blade_WarAngel/pseuds/Lady_Blade_WarAngel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“But Jaime, aren’t you always saying I’d ‘love to know what it feels like to be a woman’ and how you’re ‘strong enough’ to show me? Well show me then. I’m making a genuine offer. Or are you all talk and no action Lannister?”</p><p>Where Brienne is sick, and Jaime is annoying, and Brienne just wants to shut him up. (slightly crack)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Chicken Soup for The Stupid!

**Author's Note:**

> First off, this story came into my head from the quote Jaime makes to Brienne "You'd Love To Know What It Feels Like To Be A Woman" and the fact that I have some sort of flu/cold and my mother insisted that she didn't want to catch my plague. So, that is how this story was born. LOL!
> 
> The title just comes from me bastardising the title for that irritating book "Chicken Soup for the Soul." If anyone likes it, that's awesome, I make no judgements, but I never thought it was of any use. LOL!

Chicken Soup for The Stupid.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

Brienne hauled herself out of her bed with a pained groan. The banging at her door was making her head thump louder than it already had been all day and she was angry and fed up and all she wanted was one thing and that was the person on the other side of her door to _go away!_

“Wench! I know you’re in there!” Brienne groaned as she seriously considered hitting her head against one of her walls, until she knocked herself unconscious.

 _“What the fuck is Jaime fucking Lannister doing at my door?”_ Brienne thought as she made her way to the door. _“The sooner I answer it, the sooner he goes away and the sooner I can go back to bed and sleep.”_ She thought as she unlocked the door and opened it to glare at Jaime Lannister’s smirking face.

“What the fuck do you want Lannister?” Brienne asked angrily. Jaime blinked and looked at Brienne before somehow, walking into her flat. Brienne sighed and allowed her heavy door to slam shut.

“I was wondering what happened to you for the last three days. You’re never away from work.” Jaime stated. Brienne sighed.

“There is such a thing as time off Jaime.” Brienne stated, feeling her head start to pound and her whole body start to ache.

“You look terrible Wench. And when I say that I don’t mean in the usual way. I mean in the way that you look like death warmed up.” Jaime replied. Brienne just decided enough was enough. Jaime was being a shit, just because, and Brienne was in a foul enough mood that she would play him at his own game.

“I have the flu Jaime. You know what, I think I should pass on my good fortune to stay off work for three days. What do you think Jaime?” Brienne asked. Jaime blinked.

“What? I don’t get it.” Jaime looked confused.

“Why? Don’t you want to kiss me better Lannister?” Brienne asked, a smirk making it’s way onto her face. Jaime gaped in absolute shock.

“Brienne, I think that whatever illness you have has finally gotten to your brain and is eating it.” Jaime stated. Brienne took a step forward, and Jaime took a step backwards, almost seeming to be afraid of getting too close to her.

“But Jaime, aren’t you always saying I’d ‘love to know what it feels like to be a woman’ and how you’re ‘strong enough’ to show me? Well show me then. I’m making a genuine offer. Or are you all talk and no action Lannister?” Brienne asked. Jaime was gaping like a fish out of water. His mouth opening and closing in absolute bewilderment. She had left Jaime speechless for the first time ever since she’d met him and it actually gave her a warm glowing feeling inside. Brienne took another step forward, making a mockery of the sexy swagger she had seen other girls use around the office. She was wearing a very overlong t-shirt, that she’d been sleeping in before Jaime rudely barged in on her peace, and she normally would have been embarrassed, but she simply was just too sick to care. Jaime’s eyes were wide as she stepped forward again and Jaime stepped back, making a cross sign with two fingers, like she was a vampire. “I didn’t know Lannisters were scared of the flu?” Brienne stated with a smirk. Jaime shook his head in disbelief.

“No, no, no. Who are you and what have you done with Brienne Tarth? The Brienne Tarth I know is not this forward. Besides, I do not want a brain eating illness.” Jaime stated. Brienne grinned before moving to one side.

“I knew you were all talk. Now get out and let me go back to sleep, so I can actually get better.” Brienne stated. Jaime blinked and practically ran out of her flat, the door slamming closed behind him. Brienne couldn’t help it. She burst into laughter as she remembered the horrified look on Jaime’s face.

xXxXxXxXxXxXx

“For fuck’s sake!” Brienne cursed as she heard banging at her door again. It had been a mere day since Brienne had basically scared Jaime Lannister out of her flat by propositioning him, whilst infested with flu. She had heartily told her friend Margaery that if she had known he’d react like that, she would have done it years ago. Although, quite honestly the man was far too attractive for his own good. If Brienne thought he was serious she might seriously consider his offer. Of course, Jaime wasn’t serious. Everything was a joke to him, so Brienne didn’t take him, or his offers of sex, seriously. Brienne sighed as she got up out of bed again. Her head wasn’t aching as much as it had been yesterday, and by all accounts she was feeling much better than she had been for the last few days. She went to the door and opened it, only to see no one was there. She looked around, and just when she was about to close the door, she looked down at the floor and saw a parcel. Brienne blinked, picked it up and took it into her apartment. There was a card attached to the top which Brienne took off before opening it. The parcel was warm to the touch and once the brown paper was removed, Brienne blinked in confusion as she looked down at a container of, what appeared to be, chicken soup. She picked up the card, which had a knight and a maiden fighting a bear on the front, and opened it.

_Dear Wench._

_Yes I know your name is Brienne, but Wench is so much more fun. I thought that since you’re sick, you could do with some chicken soup. That is what normal people do when they’re sick. They eat chicken soup._

_By the way, you have amazing legs, almost rivalling those amazing, sapphire blue eyes of yours._

_Also, I’d love to take you up on your offer, once you’re not trying to kill me with the flu. I’ll definitely prove I’m not all talk then._

_Jaime Lannister,_

_The sexiest man alive._

Brienne sighed as she looked at the card and wondered whether she should be anticipating or dreading her next meeting with Jaime Lannister.

 _“Fuck it.”_ She thought to herself as she decided to eat the chicken soup and deal with Jaime when she wasn’t suffering with the flu. If he was serious, she’d deal with him when she was actually well enough to beat him to a pulp, or fuck him into oblivion, whichever happened first really. Brienne pinned the little card to her fridge and couldn’t help smiling as she wondered where this would lead her to now.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this mini ficlet. I enjoyed writing it. Please comment and let me know what you think. Comments are love. LOL!


End file.
